Not Just Any Feeling

From time to time, we hear ourselves saying that we want a love that'll consume us. We want a love that'll define us. Sometimes, I hear people say that they need love, but not just any love. I know I have said it once or twice.

I wanted to fall in love again. I wanted to feel the urgency of wanting to be with someone after being with him the day before. Of wanting to see someone even if you just saw him hours ago. I wanted to have that crazy, giddy feeling, when holding someone's hand is enough to make you smile, when silences are bearable and needed. I craved the feel of someone's arm around me, or linked to my arm, or around my waist. I wanted to know how it feels to wake up knowing that somebody's good morning text is going to greet me and to smile myself to sleep thinking of someone significant. I wanted to feel the urge to call someone just because he's the first person I thought of, someone who wouldn't mind the nonsense I want to share. I wanted to feel tiny knots in my stomach again, the giddy feeling, the dopey smile that gets to you once you know. I wanted a lot of things. All of them the better side of the story.

And here I am, writing this all the while thinking of one person and one person only. I guess I found it. And what makes it different is that I'd like to have the flipside just as much, if it means having you, having this. :)